Just A Friendly Reminder That Blake Griffin Exists and is Single
Updated: Nov 20, 2020
The world of sports has many important awards and trophies🏆. While many athletes say it's an honour "just to play the game," there are no doubt some accolades that players (wet) dream about winning ever since they were little boys. (Full disclosure: speculation.)
For many of us Canadians, it's the Lord Stanley's Cup, something we have yet to win in this country since 1993 🙄. Even though it's just "a piece of metal" to some, the Commissioner's Trophy is kiiind-of-a-big-deal to a lot of baseball players. Some of you probably weren't dreaming about the cute little asterisk next to it, but hey, what can you do? 🙈 And I can't even tell you how many friends I have that would give their left nut just to SMELL the Lombardi Trophy, so I truly can't even imagine how badly players want to win it and do, like, keg stands with it and stuff.
But there's one award that's even more prestigious than those. And I just learned about it today. ( It's called the Blake of the Year Award and I hate to break it to ya but on Monday Blake Griffin claimed the title for the second year in a row. Better luck next year. Unless you're reading this and you're Blake Griffin, in which case mazel tov and my very best
The Detroit Pistons power forward beat out Los Angeles Ram QB Blake Bortles and golf's Brooks Koepka to defend the title.
For all those interested in entering the Pardon My Take competition next year, the rules are simple:
1) Be named Blake or have Blake-like qualities
2) Answer the phone faster than the others
Griffin released some of the video footage of his journey to the 2020 championship title.
And when I read the article and watched the video, I decided my good deed of the day would be to remind you all that Griffin is one of the most entertaining basketball players of all time and that the video below exists and is FREE for us to watch. Whenever we want.
Though Griffin's position on the court is a power forward, watch him in a variety of much more sexual positions off the court in this HILARIOUS, underrated scene from Broad City. Possibly my favourite sex scene of all-time. Which I especially appreciate since I just watched it again with my Mom. For the most wholesome, fun-looking celebrity sex scene of all-time, enjoy and do with it what you will. (CLICK ON ME FOR LINK).
You're welcome, EVERYONE.
Oh yeah and LADIES. I looked it up. According to DatingCelebs.com this man is SINGLE. Just a friendly reminder that it's 2020, anything can happen, the world is ending so shoot your damn shots at all the Blakes and Blake-like men out there today and every damn day.
P.S. Blakey, if you ever want to give me an airplane ride, sit down and have some tea, or carry me around like a baby while I cry, I'm game. I would also be more than happy with a shoe I can carry around as a purse.